These Foul-Mouthed Batangueños

I was just in this mall shop looking for an audio connector when one of the salespersons tripped and nearly stumbled on something on the floor. As she struggled to balance herself, out went the expletive which she screamed for all inside the small shop to hear.

“P@ke!!!”

Of course there were smirks all around the place. Including me.

Such an expletive would have not been out of place in some obscure little bukir; but in a mall shop?

When I was a young boy, there was this plump old lady in my Mom’s hometown who if she tripped or jumped at – say – the door suddenly slamming because of the wind would let rip with a resounding, “Ut#n!!!”

“ As to that young lady at the mall whose shameless expletive had everyone in the shop smirking, I don’t think she was even for one moment apologetic at all. ”

It was not at all like she would just quietly mutter this to herself. Instead, she would shout this out for the entire neighbourhood to hear!

It was also contagious, to the youngsters in particular.

A young cousin, to her mother’s horror, apparently picked up the nasty habit and even expounded on it, “Ut#n-b*y*g!!!”

Imagine a girl of 5 or 6 shouting that!

I’m not sure at all that I hear people from other provinces do that. Those not from these parts will probably be shocked to hear such intimate parts of the anatomy used so liberally in a verbal sense.

I’m not really a prude and will tend to be more amused than shocked. It’s just one of those little idiosyncratic behaviours that makes life in this province so colourful!

Men in similar situations will probably just swear conventionally; i.e. with the PI.

“P#ta!!” is common enough; albeit suffice it to say that there are foul-mouthed men who do not find it less than masculine to scream, “P@ke!” when it suits their fancy.

The demure old ladies, will choose something less liberal.

“Pusô!!!” is something you will hear nanays sometimes scream; although when I do, I sometimes think to myself, “Inang ang nanay… Pusô daw…”

Why it always has to be the intimate parts of the anatomy, you tell me! I have yet to hear someone scream an expletive like “paa!” or “kili-kili!”

The more contemporary have evolved their own versions. Sometimes, I hear potek or putik.

Or even the preposterous shootix.

As to that young lady at the mall whose shameless expletive had everyone in the shop smirking, I don’t think she was even for one moment apologetic at all.

More amusing than anything, really. Just a Batangueño thing, I suppose.

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